Move Towards an Authentic Life: Understanding Your Personal ‘Why’

Last Updated on October 2, 2023 by Christin

Why do I feel this way? Why do I always choose the wrong choice? Why do I think so negatively? Why am I so upset? Why do I care so much? These are questions that most of us ask ourselves, and they are very important questions. It is very important to understand your personal motivation – your ‘why.’ It’s the driving force behind your actions and decisions.

By having a clear understanding of why you act as you do or think as you do, you can have a more authentic and fulfilling life experience. In essence, when you know your ‘why,’ you can change things in your life and your intentions and actions align, creating a powerful force that can lead to remarkable outcomes lead to remarkable outcomes.

What This Means For Your Relationships

find your why

We don’t always know why we act the way we do in our relationships, mostly because our feelings are leading the way, and they are not always logical.

When you ask yourself questions such as ‘Why did I do that?’ or ‘Why do I feel this way?’, and take some time to answer those questions honestly, you may be surprised at what the answers tell you about yourself or other people.

What you need and how to get your needs met are nestled in the ‘why’. For instance, if you find yourself wanting more attention from your partner, asking ‘why’ can help uncover what is missing and how it can be filled.

Understanding the ‘why’ gives us clarity on our values and desires, which in turn opens up possibilities for deeper connections in our relationships.

It also helps us to understand other people’s motivations better and prepare for their reactions.

In the end, uncovering our ‘why’ can be an empowering and transformative experience that can help us create better relationships with ourselves and others.

What This Means For Your Career

Knowing the motives behind your career will give you the success you are looking for. It is important to understand why you are drawn to certain jobs or positions and what drives your decisions.

It also helps to identify what motivates you most, whether it be money, prestige, or simply a desire for something new.

By understanding the ‘why’ behind your career choices, you will be able to make more mindful decisions and better navigate any obstacles or challenges that arise.

You will also develop a better understanding of yourself and how your passions or interests can lead to fruitful opportunities.

Knowing the ‘why’ is a powerful tool for building a meaningful career path that will bring you satisfaction and success in the long run.

When you know your ‘why,’ it can help you stay focused on the bigger picture, even when the journey is long and difficult.

You will be more confident in your abilities and less afraid to take risks or explore new possibilities.

Ultimately, knowing your ‘why’ can help you achieve career success with greater ease and fulfillment.

What This Means For Other Areas Of Your Life

Knowing your ‘why’ permeates every aspect of your life, including personal development and physical health. It helps you live your best life possible.

Intellectually, it can shape your pursuits and interests, driving you to explore certain topics and igniting a lifelong love for learning. It sharpens your mind and fuels your curiosity, leading to a richer intellectual life.

In creative endeavors, understanding your ‘why’ can bring an authenticity to your work that resonates deeply with others. It pushes you to create not for external validation, but to express your innermost thoughts and emotions, giving your work a unique, personal touch.

From a personal development standpoint, knowing your ‘why’ can guide you in setting meaningful goals and pursuing them with conviction. It encourages you to continue growing and evolving, pushing you to reach beyond your limits and step out of your comfort zone.

Physically, understanding your ‘why’ can motivate you to take care of your body and health. It could drive you to maintain an active lifestyle, eat healthier, or practice mindfulness โ€” all of which contribute to overall well-being.

Emotionally, knowing your ‘why’ sets the course for your feelings and relationships. It helps you understand and manage your emotions better, allowing you to forge deeper connections with others. It can lead you to seek out relationships and experiences that resonate with your core values, leading to greater emotional fulfilment.

In sum, understanding your ‘why’ can significantly enhance your character, creative life, intellectual life, physical health, personal development, and emotional life, providing a sense of direction, authenticity, and fulfilment across all areas of your life.

The Problem With Ignoring Your ‘Why’

You may think why bother? Why go through the effort of finding my ‘why’?

First of all, you may be lying to yourself, which isn’t good for your happiness or success. For instance, you may want to get back together with your ex, and you are telling yourself it’s because you miss the deep love that you shared, but in reality, it’s because you want to hurt them as much as they hurt you. Obviously, this is going to cause a lot more pain and suffering for both of you in the future.

Second, when you don’t know your true ‘why’, you may do things that don’t align with the life you want. For example, you may think that going to the gym will help you be healthy, when in reality your true ‘why’ is to increase your self-confidence. Going to the gym will not directly increase your self-confidence, so itโ€™s important to know what steps actually do lead towards achieving that goal.

Thirdly, if you don’t understand why you’re making certain decisions, it can lead to confusion. This confusion causes stress and anxiety leaving you feeling like you have no control over your life or future. Knowing your ‘why’ gives you clarity and allows you to make decisions that are aligned with the life you want to live.

Ultimately understanding your ‘why’ gives meaning and purpose to everything in life, which is why it is so important to take the time to understand your true motivations.

Plus, it’s an incredibly powerful tool for self-discovery, allowing you to stay true to yourself and ultimately create a life that is satisfying and fulfilling. So, take some time today to explore your motivations and understand why you do what you do, think what you think, or feel what you feel.

9 Ways To Find Your ‘Why’

You know it’s important to find your ‘why’, but how do you do it?

1. Spend Time Being Introspective

Taking a step back and examining the motivations behind your actions, thoughts, and emotions can lead to a better understanding of yourself and ultimately, your purpose.

Spending time being introspective can help you gain clarity and perspective and ultimately lead to a more fulfilling life.

To start, find a quiet and comfortable space where you won’t be distracted by outside noise or disturbances. Take a few deep breaths to center yourself and let your thoughts settle. Then, begin examining your thoughts and feelings without judgment or attachment – simply observe them from a distance.

2. Make A List Of Your Values And Priorities

Make a list of your values and priorities and consider how they shape the choices you make on a day-to-day basis.

3. Reflect On Experiences That Shaped You

Take some time to reflect on experiences – both positive and negative – that have shaped you into the person you are today.

4. Visualize Your Ideal Life

Close your eyes and visualize your ideal life. What does it look like? What kind of people, places, and activities would be a part of it?

5. Notice What Motivates You Each Day

Pay attention to the thoughts and feelings that motivate you each day. What drives your actions?

6. Ask Others For Feedback

Talk to people close to you, like friends and family, and ask for their honest feedback about what they think motivates you. Just be ready to hear some hard answers as some people will see your motivation and more sinister – greed, jealousy, etc.

7. Consider Your Strengths And Weaknesses

Think about your strengths and weaknesses, and how they have influenced your path in life. For example, do you do things just because you want to avoid being viewed at as weak?

8. Research Role Models And Learn Their ‘Whys’

Look up people you admire and research their story. What do they believe in? How did they get to where they are today? How did they discover their ‘whys’ in life. Sometimes we can’t see something we believe in on a deep level until we see it in someone else.

9. Journal Your Discoveries

As you discover your ‘why,’ keep a journal of your findings. This will help you track and remember your progress, and serve as a reference for future reflection.

Live Authentically By Knowing Your ‘Why’

Understanding your ‘why’ has the potential to revolutionize every aspect of your life. It can serve as a compass guiding your professional decisions, leading you towards roles and opportunities that resonate with your core beliefs and values. In personal relationships, knowing your ‘why’ can help you communicate more effectively, establishing deeper connections based on mutual respect and understanding.

In terms of health and well-being, understanding your motivation can give you the strength and discipline to maintain a healthy lifestyle and make choices that foster your long-term physical and mental health.

Lastly, knowing your ‘why’ can also influence your approach to challenges and setbacks, providing the resilience and tenacity needed to navigate through tough times and emerge even stronger.

All in all, discovering your ‘why’ is the key to living a fulfilled, balanced, authentic, and meaningful life.

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